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First things first: yes I am very tall, no the weather isn’t different up here, and no I don’t play basketball. Glad that’s out the way.

I’ve been a professional footballer for 20 years, have 42 England caps, have scored over 100 Premier League goals and hold the record for the most headed goals in Premier League history.

I’ve been at a fair few clubs too, including Queens Park Rangers, Portsmouth, Aston Villa, Norwich, Southampton, Liverpool, Portsmouth, Tottenham Hotspur, Stoke and England.

In my time I’ve been promoted, relegated, won trophies, gone months without scoring, been bought, sold, loaned and abused - and I've loved almost every moment of it.


How to Be a Footballer Peter Crouch

The first truly insider guide to being a Premiership footballer, from Britain’s funniest sporting icon.

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