Change the feelings caused by bullying.
There's lots of info in Girl Stuff 8-12 about how to get help to combat bullies. Here's just one part of the plan, about how to turn around some of the bad feelings bullying can provoke:
First thought: ‘It must be my fault somehow.’
More useful thought: ‘No, it’s not my fault.’
‘It’s never going to stop.’
More useful thought: ‘There are things I can do to try to make it stop – and I’ll start right now.’
‘I have to face it alone.’
More useful thought: ‘I need to talk to an adult who can help.’
‘Nothing can help me.’
More useful thought: ‘There are lots of people and strategies that can help.’
‘Nobody likes me.’
More useful thought: ‘I need to find some of My People. These are not My People.’
‘I’m scared to go to school or where the bullies are, but I can’t escape.’"
More useful thought: ‘I can escape: I need help to stop this, or to move to another school.’
‘I feel rejected and depressed.’
More useful thought: ‘I need to find some friends and get some help. I will start feeling better and be back on the way to happiness.’
‘I need to pretend I’m fine and make lots of jokes.’
More useful thought: ‘I don’t have to pretend this is okay. It’s not a joke if only one side laughs.’
‘I should pick on someone else so that they do too, and leave me alone.’
More useful thought: ‘I won’t let them turn me into a mean person.’
‘They make me feel ashamed of myself, my family and my culture.’
More useful thought: ‘I’m proud of myself, my family and my culture. It’s the bullies who have the problem.’
‘I don’t fit in anywhere.’
More useful thought: ‘This is not a place where I would want to fit in. But there is a place for me where I can be different and fit in, and I’ll find it. I am not alone.’
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